Thursday, February 8, 2007

A Devious Mind

A Devious Mind at Work

My previous post resulted in this one.

Written 31 January, 2007

A Devious Mind

I have an evil mind.

Maybe devious is a better word.

I have the sort of mind that makes me, when I hear about terrorist attacks or bank robberies, think of easier and more effective ways of carrying them out.

“That’s not how I would have done it!”

My mind works like that. Maybe a lot of peoples’ minds work like that. Maybe not. But mine does.

It’s not that I want to actually do those things. I don’t. I wouldn’t. I merely think of them.

If I were a sociopath, my devious mind would make me a true Menace 2 Society—but I’m lucky enough to have a conscience that prevents me from acting on my devious thoughts.

Almost always. I can recall two or three things I did in my life that I knew were wrong, minor things, really. I did them anyway.

I can’t tell you how guilty it made me feel. I still feel guilty.

I choose not to be a bad person. When, despite my best intentions, I start to stray across the line, my finely-tuned sense of guilt stops me cold, every time.

So now that (I hope) I’ve convinced you that despite my warped mind I’m not a danger to you, let me say that having a devious mind can be a lot of fun.

Especially when a devious mind is complemented by a well-honed sense of the ridiculous.

That’s when you get things like a giant, avatar-sized mouse trap.

No, I didn’t come up with that one. I merely wish I had. A friend showed me one this morning and I went for the cheese so it would smash me.

And it did. There was blood everywhere. Until I stood up.

I did come up with the idea of the virgin sacrifice to Pele the volcano goddess. My devious mind led me to put bloodstains on the altar at the temple to Pele and build a portal into the floor of the Dragon Skybar that lets avatars choose to sacrifice themselves to Pele. (The portal is directly over Pele’s lava pit, and selecting “Sacrifice” teleports them just above the boiling lava).

So maybe I’m glad I have a devious mind.

And I’m really glad that like my Sweetie, I use my superpowers only for good.

Would you like to sacrifice yourself to Pele the volcano goddess?

No comments: