Thursday, April 2, 2009

Chey Takes a Day Trip to Orange Island

Written 2 April, 2009

Chey Takes a Day Trip to Orange Island

Okay, I like an adventure as much as the next avatar, but getting trapped by design of the creator in ridiculous shit like this is not my idea of a good time.

I hate circular staircases in Second Life. Hate them! Not one circular stair in one hundred is engineered well enough to let someone actually climb it. A pox on whoever built this! (Uh, would seem to be one Waghorne Truss). I had to reach my camera halfway across the sim and sit on a stupid arm wrestling pose to escape!

You know what else I hate? Frigging stumpy steps! I hate that stupid stumping sound you get when you climb over an object more than about .35 meters tall. It's easy to do away with that. Just put an invisible frigging ramp over it, dumbass!

You know what else I hate? I'm sure you do. You're just dying to know, aren't you? I hate pretentiousness. Check this out:

"Sugar, Spice, Snails, and Tails: The Human Element" is an immersive, metaphorical journey highlighting the opposing forces of life and how these same forces forge us into strong, balanced, powerful, harmonious beings."

Bullshit. It's a series of interconnected tunnels in the sky with particle effects like spiders and glowy moving prims. I blew through it in like 15 seconds. But hey, I felt completely strong, balanced, powerful, and harmonious afterward!

The particle house was cool, though. For like 5 seconds. Okay, so you made a very rough outline of a house using particles. What does it DO? And if you made it without prims, what the hell am I standing on? And just what, pray tell, is emitting all those orange particles?
Still, at least this exhibit made a bit of sense.

Another exhibit purported to be an attempt to create an environment of trees and flowers purely from sculpties. Oh-kay. But does it have to be so darn fugly? It looks like Bad Acid Trip Meets the Flintstones.

There are more exhibits here, but I'm escaping with what's left of my sanity.

So, what do you think? Do I have a future as a travel writer?

1 comment:

Kanomi said...

"So, what do you think? Do I have a future as a travel writer?"

Absolutely, it is a much needed public service.