Sweetie's Sweet

 Sweetie in Warrior Woman Outfit

Written 8 May, 2007

Sweetie’s Sweet!

My Sweetie is back on the grid, so hooray!

And she’s so sweet!

On Saturday she went shopping with our friend Aldo and came back with oodles of presents for me, including the beautiful ring and necklace in the photos. Then we went shopping and bought eyes, clothes, and jewelry, woo hoo! It’s three days later, and I’m STILL sorting out items!

Sweetie is such a dear! I adore her, I truly do. I am so very lucky to have found her!

Speculations on Sculpted Prims

Written 9 May, 2007

Speculations on Sculpted Prims

When I got to the Beta grid, Sweetie was playing with sculpted prims.

She doesn’t yet have the software to prepare them off-world, but she had discovered that some textures work as maps for the sculpted prims. They instantly jump into convoluted and often jagged shapes.

I straightaway discovered that any snapshot would work and on my first effort made a raggedy shape that Sweetie thought would make a good wing. She took a copy and so did I—but it did not come with us to the main grid—nor did the 43+k lindens I had in my account in the beta world.

I wanted to make a couple of points about the effects sculpted prims will have.

I don’t yet know their limitations, so I may be entirely out of line, but…

How cool if sculpted prims can replace the textured prims that make up so many building facades, fences, foliage, and complex multi-prim objects like prim statues and 1966 Mustang convertibles. How much less cartoonish the world will look!

How neat if they can form intricate shapes that now take large numbers of prims. Perhaps that Mustang’s body will soon consist of only one prim instead of 19. And think of the effect on prim space. Perhaps there will finally be enough prims to make the lush landscapes so many of try to achieve on our paltry 117 prims / 512 square meter parcels.

And think of the incentive for builders. Everyone will want to replace their prim houses, living room sets, cars, shoes, hairdos, trees, and weapons with more realistic-looking objects made from sculpted prims (and with a far lower prim count).

I’m predicting a LOT of commerce around these new items. It will be like transitioning from 8-track to cassette or Beta to VHS or LPs to CDs or Commodore 64s to the Macintosh. The consumer mentality of most of us will lead us to replace most of what we have with the new objects.

Pretty soon old prims will look outdated. And then they’ll be rediscovered, and there will be high-end retro prim shops that specialize in the non-sculpted prims no one is using any more.

And in the far future, some Second Life anthropologist will find a 185-prim waterfall or a 43-prim couch and go WTF? and a museum will be opened to showcase her finds.

Maybe someone will invent a rezzer which will replicate our expensive multi-prim objects with sculpted prims.

One can only hope.

Voice on the Beta Grid

Sweetie's Dragon Avatar Getting Spray Painted

Experimenting with Voice on the Beta Grid

Written 9 May, 2007

Voice on the Beta Grid

Sweetie and I went to the beta grid (our first trip there) on Saturday.

Straightaway, Sweetie was griefed by a paint-spraying idiot (perhaps because Sweetie was in her dragon alt) and I filed two grievance reports—one for the assault, and another when I was cursed and deliberately bumped after telling said idiot I’d filed the first report.

And then I got an IM from my friend Patrice, asking if she could teleport me to another beta sim to give her some feedback on voice. Sure, I said.

Sweetie came along, and so did our friend Aldo, whose computer is solid on the main grid, but who kept crashing in beta.

And we spoke.

All I can say is—it works.

And I think it will be a problem, technically, until everyone sorts things out.

Some of the half-dozen avs spoke loudly and clearly; the voice of others was low in volume and difficult to hear. My own voice, or so everyone told me, was low in volume until I turned on microphone amplification in the Sound menu.

I’m not yet certain about the location of voices in three-dimensional space or how much might be lost if you’re not looking directly at the av who is speaking or are too far away from her, but it seemed sounds faded abruptly with distance.

And I should say I got a precursor of some of the things about voice that trouble so many people.

First, one of my friends didn’t sound at all as I had imagined. I’ll leave it at that.

And second, the one av who wasn’t speaking was soon feeling marginalized. There are going to be a lot of instant second-class citizens when voice finds its way to the main grid.

Another Creation

Two-Prim Stone Bench at Rail Stop

Original Whatever You Call it at the Pele Gardens Rail Stop

Longer Whatever You Call It

Written 9 May, 2007

Another Creation

The rail stops at Pele feature simple two-prim stone benches. They look appropriate to the setting and work quite well—but I wanted something fancier at the Pele Gardens stop.

And so I made a—I’m not sure what to call it, a rest, perhaps, or a covered bench— little structure on which one can sit while waiting for the train. It’s more or less modeled upon similar constructions along the MARTA bus lines here in Atlanta. I wanted something utiliarian and anti-pretty.

I could have made a really cool one, but I was trying to be primficient and so limited myself to seven—one for the roof, one for the floor and sides, one for the back, one for a window in the rear, a bench, a floor, and the seventh for a Pele Light Rail sign.

It occurred to me as I was writing this that I could perhaps make the whatever-you-call-it a little more inelegant by stretching it, and so I will.

More Pictures of the Lake and Bridge

More pictures of the Lake and Bridge, and a bonus snapshot of the view from the rental properties.

Only one rental house left vacant, woo hoo!

The Eagle, The Lake, The Bridge

Written 9 May, 2007

The Eagle, The Lake, The Bridge

Ben Franklin was all for making the wild turkey America’s national bird, but less wise heads prevailed, and our national bird became the carrion-eating bald eagle. I sometimes wonder how that choice has shaped our national character.

But no more politics in this blog, at least until the TSA does something really stupid.

But for all its petty nature, the bald eagle does look magnificent as it soars around the sky.

And besides, my neighbors Leaf Sherman and Armando Frangilli had one, and every time I saw it, I thought about how cool it would be to have an eagle riding the thermals above Pele’s caldera.

And so, in violation of the Endangered Species Act (do you know it’s illegal for an American to even own an eagle feather?) I took myself straightaway to Creative Fantasies and bought one. Now he (or she, how does one tell with an eagle?) patrols Pele, circling serenely some 10 meters above the topmost part of the Temple to Pele.

-----

A lesser landlady might have stuck a rental house on the 2K property that lay between the various rental houses on the east end of Forsaken, but I didn’t want to do that. And so at Sweetie’s suggestion I sunk the land and made a little lake. It features a rock-rimmed shore on which there are poses that let avatars dip their toes into the water, a sunken tiki face, a turtle, a fountain, a giant lily pad on which to sit or sunbathe, and a tiki private balcony from JC Designs for lounging with friends. There are float poses in the water and an expanse of huge prim flat rock that lies just under the surface for wading. A kiss and a dance are hidden somewhere on the lake.

The lake is convenient to the rental houses (three of which are now occupied) and the train station, although those walking over from Pele Rail will need to avoid the little pool of lava beside the lake.

-----

There’s now a bridge spanning the Forsaken River, raised to a height that will allow passage of water craft (with the exception of tall sailboats, but no worry, as moving vehicles are nonphysical anyway).

The center span was purchased from JC Designs, and is stunning, although quite high in prims. (I recently purchased a rope bridge at Svarga that, at 9 prims, will serve the same purpose, but it’s not nearly so beautiful, and I’ll use it only if the available prims drop below a safe level.

I rezzed a copy of the little tiki house in which my friend Melissa Y. now lives, unlinked it, and used the parts from the outside ramps to make ramps leading to the center section of the bridge. I finished by putting an inlay of tiles on the part of the ramp that faces the rail station and that was that.

Obituary

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(Cut the above and paste in Chat. You can make it into a gesture if you know how)

Veteran Pillsbury spokesman Pop N. Fresh died Wednesday of a severe yeast infection. He was 71. He was buried on Friday in one of the biggest funerals in years. Dozens of celebrities turned out including Mrs. Butterworth, the California Raisins, Hungry Jack, Betty Crocker, Sara Ann, and the Hostess Twinkies. The gravesite was piled high with flours, as longtime friend Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy, describing Fresh as a man who "never knew how much he was kneaded."

Mr. Fresh rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a smart cookie, and wasted much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Still, even as a crusty old man, he was a roll model to millions.

Mr. Fresh is survived by his second ex-wife. They had two children and one in the oven. Mr. Fresh is also survived by his long-term partner, Speedy Alka-Seltzer, and their adopted son, Teleport Tom.

Warning: Politics Ahead!

Warning! The following blog has political content. If criticism of the policies of the government of the United States gets your blood up, you might want to go read a blog about dressmaking or something.

Teleportation Security Administration

Written 30 April, 2007

Teleportation Security Administration

Until now, I’ve held my peace about Bush in this blog. The reason I’m finally venting is because the U.S. government has just announced its intention to monitor teleportation activity in Second Life.

The Bush White House is claiming jurisdiction because Linden Lab is headquartered in San Francisco, which is technically a part of the United States.

This morning Condi Rice announced the formation of the Teleportation Security Administration.

The TSA will be modeled after the OTHER TSA—the Transportation Security Administration. Those are the people who make the world safe for democracy by taking away your shampoo and perfume at airports and making you take off your shoes.

But Condi tells us the new TSA will be friendlier than the old TSA. Why? Because of Teleport Tom.

Teleport Tom will replace the much-maligned color coding and duct-tape-your-windows advisories of the Rumsfeld era.

“Teleport Tom is happy.”

“Teleport Tom is sad.”

“Teleport Tom is dialing 911.”

Teleport Tom has not yet been cast, but rumors are he’ll be played by the adopted son of advertising icons Speedy Alka-Seltzer and Poppin’ Fresh.

--

Anyone who has flown commercially since 2001 knows the joy of dealing with the Transportation Security Administration.

--

“Did you pack your bags yourself? Have they been out of your sight at any time?”

“Step through the scanner, please.”

“I need you to take your computer out of the case.”

“Please come with us for a full body cavity search.”

--

It will be much worse in Second Life.

Sweetie and I were talking about just how bad it will be. We were laughing on the phone as we thought up additional TSA hassles. We’re so bad.

In fact, this blog should be credited to her as much as me. Except the George W. part. That’s me entirely.

So, the TSA in Second Life:

Them: Will you please take off your Xcite! ass and put it in the tub? One Xcite! part per tub.

Xcite! Ass: Beads of sweat are starting to form on Cheyenne Palisades’ skin.

You: Could you please try not to handle it so much?

--

Them: We’re going to have to hand scan those prim breasts. They won’t fit through the machine. Will you come this way, please?

You: What a hassle! I already had to buy extra seats for them. One seat per breast. This trip is costing me an effing fortune!

--

Them: You’re not going to be able to teleport today. You’re on the Watch list.

You: Whatever for?

Them: Did you or did you not post a blog critical of the President?”

--

Them: This passport is invalid.

You: It can’t be!

Them: Are you arguing with the government of the United States? If you are, there’s a cell in a secret CIA prison in a badly-decorated Gorean dungeon sim waiting for you.

You: I know it’s valid.

Them: According to our records, there is no independent nation-state of Pele.

--

“This airport is now in condition red. We have an unattended .5 x .5 x .5 plywood prim in the terminal. We need a chemical sniffer script at Gate 19 immediately. "

--

“Folks, listen up! You’ll need to take off all your gadgets or you’ll set off the alarm when you go through security, and you know what that means! That means all jewelry, HUDs, and flight feathers. What? Yes, your sexy walk, too. No, your hair can stay on, unless it has barrettes, clasps, or other ornaments. Tattoos can stay on. You there with the personal hugger. Off it comes! And Miss, that flexi skirt will never fit through the scanner. "

--

"Sir, you’ll need to stow your huge prim hat in an overhead bin or underneath the seat in front of you.”

--

"I’m sorry, ma’am, but for safety reasons we can’t let you board with that shoulder dragon attached.”

--

The TSA could be helpful on the back end of the teleportation process, though—especially if you suffer one of those dreadful TP accidents. Just imagine:
-
Them: Please bend over, Ms. Palisades. Our highly trained and efficient staff will be happy to help you pull your shoes and hairdo out of your ass.

--

In fact, the whole teleportation-commercial flying analogy may explain why some TPs fail:

“We’re sorry, but for no apparent reason your teleport has been cancelled.”

“In today’s news, a failed simulator in the Chicago area has resulted in hundreds of cancelled or delayed teleports all up and down the East Coast."

“This is the Captain. Please fasten your seat belts. We’re expecting a bit of lag.”

“This is the Captain again. We’re experiencing some minor mechanical difficulties—just a gauge; it does not, repeat NOT have anything to do with the landing gear—and will need to return to the Snowcrash Regional Airport.”

(You just have to wonder—if the problem IS with the landing gear, why return to the point of departure? You can crash just as easily at the destination airport.)

“Captain Linden again. It seems we flew over a full parcel and our low-prim Boeing 767 was dematerialized. Our stewardesses—all played by males, incidentally—will help you sort out your luggage.” (mumble, mumble, mumble) “Oh, it seems the luggage was dematerialized as well. Odds are you’ll find your luggage in the Lost and Found folder in your inventory. Delta Teleport Lines and Linden Lab are not, repeat not, responsible for inventory loss. Thank you for teleporting Delta.”

--

Teleportation is about to become very difficult.